“Is my pastor a spiritual abuser?”

That’s the unavoidable question for many over the last 10 years as we’ve watched the rise and fall of several famous evangelical preachers. Even faithful pastors face heightened scrutiny as convictional leadership becomes confused with the next Mars Hill fiasco in waiting.

But Michael Kruger, president of Reformed Theological Seminary in Charlotte, North Carolina, says the problem is bigger than even the investigative reports would suggest. He argues that many more cases of spiritual abuse will never be covered in the podcasts.

And he contends a big part of the problem is . . . you and me.

“We would rather have a leader who will beat up our enemies than one who will tenderly care for the sheep,” Kruger writes in his new book, Bully Pulpit: Confronting the Problem of Spiritual Abuse in the Church (Zondervan). 

Spiritual abuse is a relatively new and amorphous concept. Kruger defines it this way:

It’s the opposite of Jesus and his paradoxical ministry model. He didn’t lead by demanding his rights but by giving them up.

Mike joined me for a vigorous, 50-minute conversation about how to train pastors who won’t abuse their flocks, why he focuses on Reformed churches, whether he’s changed his own leadership, and more.

What haunts me is why some churches don’t want to stop spiritual abuse even when they know it’s happening. When churches fail to hold abusers to account, they tarnish faithful ministers trying to wield authority with humility.

Oh, and one small final note: whatever you do, be sure to review your leaders every year by talking to the people who serve under them. And share those reviews with the other designated leaders.