When approached about becoming a youth group leader at my church, I was initially hesitant. Teenagers are scary. I hardly knew how to have good conversations with them, let alone teach them effectively about Jesus.

Now, seven years later, I continue to head to church every Friday night for youth group. I still feel inadequate for the task, but I’ve seen how crucial it is for teenagers to be taught about Jesus and have the Christian life modeled to them.

My role only requires one evening and scattered hours throughout the week. But if you’re the parent of a teenager, you’re living this job full-time. You may have some of the same worries I had: How can I ask my teen questions that elicit more than a one-word answer? How can I connect with her when I don’t understand what’s going on in her social media world? What if he thinks this whole Jesus thing is lame?

Let Jen Oshman come alongside you with three truths and four tips for discipling teens. She encourages parents to faithfully pass along the grace they’ve received from Jesus by embracing ordinary habits. These practices—like guarding time together and going to church—may seem unremarkable, but they’re among the means God uses to save and shape teenagers (and all of us).

Even though Oshman’s article is aimed at parents, any church member will benefit from reading it—even if just for the insight that “grumbling doesn’t reflect God’s love for adolescent image-bearers.” I wonder how much better our churches would be at cultivating our teens’ love for Jesus if we rejected cynicism and groaning about TikTok trends in favor of faithful prayer that God would transform young people by his grace.