I have often thought of this obviously unrealistic scenario since I have been a pastor. The thought was given a fresh gust of wind when I read this from Michael Horton in his book Christless Christianity:
What would things look like if Satan actually took over a city? The first frames in our imaginative slide show probably depict mayhem on a massive scale: Widespread violence, deviant sexualities, pornography in every vending machine, churches closed down and worshipers dragged off to City Hall. Over a half-century ago, Donald Grey Barnhouse, pastor of Philadelphia’s Tenth Presbyterian Church, gave his CBS radio audience a different picture of what it would look like if Satan took control of a town in America. He said that all of the bars and pool halls would be closed, pornography banished, pristine streets and sidewalks would be occupied by tidy pedestrians who smiled at each other. There would be no swearing. The kids would answer “Yes, sir,” “No, ma’am,” and the churches would be full on Sunday … where Christ is not preached
In this vein, it is good to think about what the enemy would do (or is doing) in effort to gain an advantage. The job is done by football defensive coordinators, military generals, and business executives. It is also helpful for pastors like me.
Premise: We start with the basic premise that God uses the Scriptures to bring people to Christ (Rom. 10.17) and grow them into maturity (Eph. 4.15). Therefore whatever Satan must do he must do to the word of God.
Too Tough to Understand
If I were Satan I would convince pastors that the Scriptures are hard to understand so therefore they need to be made more simple. This dilutes the word and actually makes it something else (think transubstantiation). The result would be that people would not really hear and understand God’s word. They will be busy but stupid.
Remove the Offense
I would also have a good secondary punch. I would convince leaders and laity that the Bible is far too offensive. I would try to pervert the great commission into a baptism of the church into the world; the conversion would be totally backwards! In the name of outreach I could convert the church to product-centered pragmatic business practices! Churches would then be careful not to offend those outside the church. We would completely remove the offense. I know of course that the offensive part about the gospel is actually Jesus. And to be specific, his cross (1 Cor. 1.18, 23). If I bury this amid an ostensibly noble effort to ‘reach people’ then no one would ever be reached! And anyone who comes to the church will never see or worship the real Jesus because they will never know him. But they will like these people and their Jesus because…they are nice to them, have coffee, and look just like them.
Emphasize the Subjective
In the event that people read the Bible themselves or someone faithfully proclaims Christ to them and they get converted, I would need a back up plan. What would I do with those professing Christians who go to church every week? Well, since I can’t snatch them out of Christ’s hand I will settle for confusing them royally. I would steal their joy and puncture their hope. I will cause them to downplay God’s revelation from outside of them and instead rely upon subjective internal impulses. I will trick them to make them think that God is subjectively talking with them with clarity and that the Scriptures are difficult, unclear, and impersonal. This way they can just ignore their bibles and look inward (Hey, it worked on the Hindus!) I can think of some great mainstream evangelical authors to help get this going.
Eclipse Jesus glory with their glory
Now for those churches that still have sermons I will make them loathe doctrine, theology, & biblical exposition. Instead they will crave ‘practical’ teaching that will help them. This of course is code for moralistic, therapeutic deism (to use Michael Horton’s terms). They will be instructed on how to make this world their heaven and make themselves their Savior! Through this I would be able to completely remove any need for the work of Christ. The people would not grow up to look like Christ at all! They would look like my favorite sons, the Mormons! They would not love Christ or hope for his return as they disdain sin or this world. They certainly would not hate me. But they would be nice. And cool. And of course, Republican.
Make Legalists & Pharisees
If I were Satan I would still need a plan for the churches that preach the Bible. This would be complicated but extremely do-able.
I would make these churches hate everyone who does not look just like them. They would be so sick of everyone else’s compromise that they would think that they are the standard. They would be discouraged by God’s presence in the churches, his power in their lives, and his desire to bring in his kingdom by saving rebels. In addition to hating other Christians they would hate unbelievers! They would never think of telling them about Jesus because then they might have to hang out with them. And plus, if a bunch of people got converted then there might be a shortage of white dress shirts and ties.
Though this venom would start with true righteous anger, I think I could, over time, bring this thing to a boil so that their self-identity would fully eclipses the person and work of Jesus. They could become the angry version of the second group above. Their righteousness would exceed everyone’s (even Jesus!) and their rules would stand over God’s! This insular club could potentially get so jaded that they would not even use the Scriptures for anything except arrows to shoot at others. This would surely grow hard, unresponsive, callous hearts under nice dress shirts.
Politics, Music, and Publishing
I could also work on the political scene. If we just gave them a cause then they could have a good identity. The cause could be to hate gay people and Democrats. This would be very easy and there is already a logo.
With all of this I would get a few radio stations that would play love songs to Jesus but never actually mention his name or why he is lovely. I could make them feel good but be stupid. They could sing about how they love this guy that they really don’t know. This is so safe, so ideal, so appealing.
Then I could go ahead and let some of my best demons loose in the Christian publishers. They could help reinforce my philosophy of ministry. The books would appeal to the flesh and help hold the big tarp over Jesus’ head. It’ll stay our little team building secret.
Conclusion
From my seat it looks a lot like Satan is in charge. This is what is going on today. However, we know he is not. Christ is seated at the right hand of the Father. He is ceaselessly and successfully interceding for his church. He is standing at the peephole of the door of eternity, ready to kick it down and return. He is in control, he is king.
It is, however, time for Christian leaders to [re]discover the glory of Christ in the gospel; his power, beauty, and glory! If and when we do we will preach and live like it; we will, like Josiah, remove the high places.