Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy. Prov. 27:5–6
Merciful Jesus, many of us need courage and grace today for loving in sticky, broken, messy relationships. Sometimes the fear of making an even bigger mess makes it easier just to ignore certain people and issues. But that’s like trying to avoid a skin cancer on our face or a torn ligament in our knee. The situation will only get worse. Time by itself heals nothing. Time plus your grace can heal anything.
Thank you for the stark frankness and laser precision of your Word. When we multiply kisses, but withhold life-giving rebukes from our friends, we’re living as their enemy. When we’re not willing to offer a redemptive wounding, we’re bad at friendship—we contradict the gospel. To say we’re conflict avoidant isn’t a personality description, it’s a confession of sin—an acknowledged weakness that is not okay. Have mercy on us, Jesus. Grant us the strength, words, and faithfulness we need to love to your glory.
Jesus, we acknowledge our fear of man and our love of the approval of man; our manipulative flatteries and our commitment to self-protection. But instead of hanging our heads in shame, we run to you in hope. Instead of making excuses, we take up our crosses. We only enjoy eternal comfort because you cared enough to confront us. We only peacefully rest in your love because you painfully revealed our need for your gospel. Our lives are hidden safely in you only because you openly rebuked us by your Word and Spirit. We have no other Friend like you.
On the cross, you took the ultimate “unfriendly wounding” of sin and judgment that we might know your kisses to be those of a Savior-Bridegroom. By your wounds for us, we have been healed and by your wounding of us, we come to greater freedom. We praise you for your sacrifice and your affection; your tenacity and your kindness. Help us now, we pray, with the resources of the gospel, to love well in the very situations we dread—in our homes and churches, extended families and circles of friendship.
Give us a vision of recaptured friends, redeemed relationships and the fullness of your kingdom. Help us live as ambassadors of reconciliation, not as rebels from redemption. So very Amen we pray, in your strong and compassionate name.