Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, the watchman stays awake in vain. It is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest, eating the bread of anxious toil; for he gives to his beloved sleep. Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward. Ps. 127:1-3
Heavenly Father, it’s a joy to address you today as the architect and builder of your own house—including the household of faith, and our children’s place in your family and story.
As I look back over the years at the ways my parenting was marked by pragmatics and moralism, fear and control, I’m saddened; but I am also gladdened, for you’ve always been faithful to your covenant love, even when I was overbearing and under-believing. The move from parenting by grit to parenting by grace was a slow but fruitful journey—a journey that continues.
You’ve rescued me from parental “laboring in vain”—assuming a burden you never intended parents to bear. Father, only you can reveal the glory and grace of Jesus to our children. Only you can give anyone a new heart. You’ve called us to parent as an act of worship—to parent “as unto you,” not as a way of validating ourselves, getting our kids to like us, proving our worthiness of your love.
I was arrogant to assume my best parenting days accomplished what you alone have graciously done in the lives of my children. I was equally arrogant to believe my worst parenting days forever limited what you will be able to accomplish in the future. I now understand the undue pressure our children feel when we parent more out of our guilt and pride, than by your love and grace.
Since our children and grandchildren are your inheritance, Father, teach us how to care for them as humble stewards, not as anxious owners. More than anything else help us parent and grandparent in ways that best reveal the unsearchable riches of Christ. Give us quick repentances and observable kindnesses. Convict us quickly and deeply, when our parenting contradicts the truth and ways of the gospel (Gal. 2:14). So very Amen we pray, in Jesus’ grace-full and faithful name.